actually i made this blog for it to become my online journal. i personally thought it was cool! but deep within this feelings of temporary contentment, the truth is, im sad. im blue. im hurt. i acnt barely describe this feelings of loneliness and rejection hwne it gets me... there's this guy.... whom i actullyi myselfcouldnt understand how i feel about him..there were times na i would miss him,,,times na i hate him for not calling and thinking he's neglacteing me at all..we ahvent really been clasmates in the whole 11 years of our life in school , samakatuwid, we are TOTALLY ALIENS to each other. yes, ive heard of him from friends of friends and stand a familiar faces according to him..it's just that moment that when his friends left him for a meeting coz he's an half hour late and we happen to be there for a practice for a school play that he joined our group becoz my friend and other frends are his frends,,,except me,...(that's the first time ive talked to him)...what a heck of a friendsly person!! (that's what i sorta liked about him..he tagged along and bwala! we found ourselves exchanging numbers and being happy to have met someone old but new...i cant barely recall the time and the reason why and how we started to be phonemates....and that...is the beginning of my fall....it's that in his arms, i was in danger of falling deeper...since then, everynight,,it has become our daily habit to talk to each other its as if our day wouldnt be complete....crazy as it may be,,,it did go on for months...months of nights of truly a heaven for me,,,one day...it strucked me and i found myself longing of him, that suddenly ive been thinking of him often, wishing he's beside me. but i guess this wasnt my fairy tale story,,he liked another girl and it's putting me in vain hearing stories of how he muchly adore that girl. all i could do is pretend i was happy for him,and jst thinking that i was the gurl he was talking about.,but i never thought that what i wanted couldnt come true, for it did..ϋone night he confessed that he's strting to like me...that that's the reason he kept on calling,telling me how he misses me ....he couldnt be more mushy.....he asked if i also had the so called 'feelings' and of course i did gave in..(heck opportunity knocks..) i couldnt be more happier..i really thought this is it..my moment. my moment to finally have someone who loves me for who i am...but i was wrong...his so called 'feelings' that i so much for my assumingness, would grow...didnt last long...i hate myself. for being so damn stupid to fall..to fall so hard that i couldnt even stand up...ϋ